The Good, The Bad and The Wookies – #1: WWE Monday Night Raw, February 6th 2012
Hello, this is your’s truly Shooterclaus with my first WWE review on the Wookie’s Corner. Normally our blog is supposed to be in German, but I consider writing the WWE stuff in English due to our great support on Twitter (@wookiescorner) – most of our followers just don’t speak the fucking German, so I will write at least this first one in English.
How is this column supposed to be structured like? Well, I think this is a blog that is supposed to deliver short snacks for short breaks, so it has be to the point. So I thought for each WWE show I pick the best and the worst aspects of it and list them – in general WWE shows always show light and shadow, so I should find enough for both sides. Yadda yadda yadda, let’s get this thing going – however, I am only perfect in German and Wookie language, so don’t hassle me for any mistakes. If you do, I’m gonna suplex you, put you in the Wookie Clutch, break your back and make you humble. Ok?
– CM Punk vs Chris Jericho feud: No matter how disappointing most people might find that “End of the world” thing, these two in one feud still makes half of the Internet jizz their pants for a good reason – they are indeed two of the f’n best wrestlers on this earth. These two define the term “total package”. Jericho’s explanation was a bit of a lackluster, but at least he filled the holes of the storyline, so we can get this big epic thing started. Jericho in dickhead-mode is pure gold. Well, both of them are pure gold almost always.
– Build-up for Undertaker vs HHH: There is not much of a need for a third Mania match between these two. But it seems that at least they’re giving them an actual storyline this time, so it might end up pretty great. Hunter’s promo was solid and credible as usual and seeing the Deadman sitting in his home and having collages of ripped out newspaper articles on the wall was really creepy and awesome. The Undertaker would fuck Jigsaw’s ass and make him humble. Really good stuff.
– Kane as the ladies’ man again: Is it time for the Big Red Machine to impregnate another diva? He might have abducted Eve now and this should lead to some weird and fucked-up stuff next week. Seeing Kane as an actual creep is always nice. Maybe Zack Ryder should look up Snitsky’s number.
– CM Punk’s new shirt: I oh so need this shirt. Period.
– D Bryan’s turn continued well: They’re continuing to give his “fluke” title-win a sense and turn him into a super-jerk. The match with Big Show was pretty nice (holy fuck what a spear by Big Show!) and the ending didn’t hurt anyone. Best line: “I will still be a vegan”. Bryan as an asshole in moralizer-mode is gotta be great.
– Announcement for the Ambulance Match: We haven’t seen an Ambulance Match in quite some time and it should be the right kind of match for a chaotic brawl between Kane and Cena. The whole feud had many trashy scenes, so this (a bit) trashy kind of match might be fitting. I like trash. Still, despite all the trash, the story between Kane and Cena can be taken seriously, which is a good thing.
– HBK: At this point I am not overexcited about the announcement, because I thought he should have been involved in the Undertaker – HHH feud last year much more, but seeing him again should be good anyway. At least just to hear his theme, which is still beyond amazing.
– Cena Promo Video: Yes, I think this is a good thing. The video featured new scenes, I like the Wrestlemania theme song very much and if they don’t overdo it, promo videos like that can make people more excited about the big upcoming events. I hate to see videos like that on PPV, but on a weekly television show it’s perfectly fine.
– Focus on angles: I had a serious argument on Twitter over this, but I am the kind of guy who doesn’t need great wrestling matches on a weekly television show. I’d even say that I am a bit pissed if there is an awesome match on Raw and I miss half of it due to advertisements. The focus was clearly set on continuing the several feuds and that was done nicely.
– Main event with a real purpose: Always nice to see a main event in which there is something on the line. Letting the six participants fight out the #6 spot was a good idea and seeing a rare match stipulation like that was also cool.
I gotta say, it was a good Raw. I enjoyed it. Still, some things sucked at least a little bit.
– Loss of reality for HHH?: Hunter acted like his match with The Undertaker was the super dream match everyone was excited about. Ding dong, wake up, it is not. Their previous two encounters at Mania were both good matches, but a third one? I wished to see The Undertaker wrestle another guy. At least they give them a storyline this time, so it might end up being super entertaining, as I already said.
– End of the world as we know it?: I don’t hate Jericho’s explanation as much as many folks on the Internet do. Sure, they made us expect something revolutionary and epic, but I am just so happy about the feud between him and Punk, that I can’t complain too much. Jericho’s promo didn’t blow my mind away, but in my opinion it was at least decent. But still, the whole Jericho stuff of the last weeks pissed so many people off, disappointed them and took a ton of heat away, that I have to mention it on the negative side, too. It didn’t suck big time, but I have to admit that it could have been way better.
– Disappointing Main Event: The Six Pack Challenge had its moments, but overall the match was a bit of a mess. Don’t get me wrong, it was not a bad match, but there was more potential in it. Maybe the structure got lost after R-Truth’s bad landing, which took him out of the contest.
– Injuries: R-Truth had his lucky day and did not get injured seriously. But Eve can’t say that, she broke her nose. Maybe a nice Kane mask for Eve next week?
– Divas in the middle of nowhere: Eve and AJ seem to be the only divas at the moment that are having a real programme going on. The actual Diva’s Division is almost dead right now, the talented Natalya has to job almost every time, which is a joke and I hope we will at least get an awesome fight between Beth and Kharma at Wrestlemania. Give them ten minutes and they should deliver the best divas match we have seen in years.
– The Great Khali: I respect him for wearing the pyjama pants like a boss, but seeing him back in a major role is something you don’t really need. Seeing him pin talented young guys like Cody is bad, but at least Khali’s size and natural credibility makes sure that he doesn’t totally bury the guys by defeating them.
– Barrett Barrage?: First of all, Wade Barrett’s new theme seems to suck. His old one fitted him very well, so why change it in the first place? This week, he wasn’t pinned, but had already lost to Orton on Smackdown. He had a serious push going on and was about to make it to the next level and is now also stuck in the middle of nowhere again. Quo vadis, Wade? Elimination Chamber, then probably Money in the Bank Ladder Match at Wrestlemania – multimen matches only and probably no focus on him until they give him the next run for glory.
– Sheamus just killing time: Sheamus will make his decision after the PPV and until then he might continue doing the same stuff he has been doing since summer: killing time, squashing others and waiting for an actual feud.
– No Funkasaurus: Brodus started to become dull, he needs to offer something new and probably wrestle some serious matches now. They didn’t seem to have time for him on Raw, so he has to be on Smackdown 101%. If they drop the ball on him now, they are out of their minds. Brodus won’t hang on to the dance gimmick forever for sure, but he has a ton of potential so they should have him on TV every week. I didn’t read the Smackdown report yet, but I hope he will be there.
That’s it for Monday Night Raw, quite a good show this week, the article ended up to be a bit longer than I wanted it to be, but I hope it was quite readable. At the moment I don’t know if I will switch to German in future WWE articles, but having at least some content for the international audience should be nice. So stay tuned and check out our blog and our Twitter account @wookiescorner every day. Big things happening at the moment, especially on Twitter! Thanks, see you next time and don’t poker with Lando Calrissean, he is a fucking cheater.